where the loons call

I watched the Eastern White Pine Trees rise up around me as I crossed the provincial line into Ontario and was immediately filled with peace.

Spent a night in a cozy prospector tent, took a canoe at sunset, canoeing for the first time in many years. Just lighting my heart on fire and truly being like “am I actually here???” Did I actually MAKE IT? Like I have been dreaming of this moment for so many months and working so hard and HERE I AM.

Then the next morning off to Kakabeka Falls and Sleeping Giant. Last longest day of driving. Rain. Transport trucks. Long winding stretches of highway. Arriving after dark to soup and my tent. And the next day 21.8km of hiking in the heat and bugs and sunshine to the top of the giant. A place I had dreamed about seeing since I was a little kid. And to finally see it was such a dream. To stand on the tallest cliffs in Ontario and look out at Lake Superior. So magnificent. Truly such a special place. Singing and listening to podcasts and day dreaming as I hiked back. Jumping into Lake Superior to cool my sweaty back and aching legs. To a shower and laundry and hot soup and my cozy tent and duvet to snuggle under and fall asleep to the sound of the loons calling on and on and on.

To another day of driving once again, listening to a podcast on Saint Francis of Assisi and arriving to the black flies and mosquitoes of Northern Ontario.

And the smells as I hiked, everything brings me back to my favourite memories of Algonquin summers and paddle trips deep into the backcountry. The fishy smell of the lake. The deep murky colour of the water. The particles floating. The hot hot hot humid sun. The bugs. The smell of the trees and marshy water and plants mixed with the sap and mud and rocks. IT’S ALL HERE. It’s all the same. It’s all mine to behold and love and protect with everything I’ve got because THIS is where I love. This is where I call home. This is home.

My hair is heavy again from the thick humidity of Ontario summers. My baby hairs are going wild. My hair is unruly and frizzy and wild again. My body itches from mosquito bites and black flies swarming but I don’t care. I don’t care in the least bit because all I am is happy to be home.

Pukaskwa. Oh beautiful beautiful Pukaskwa. With its white sand beaches. Rugged coast. Eating wild blueberries as I hiked along the lichen covered rocks and feeling my bare feet on the forest floor. The blow of the sand prickling my skin as I read on the beach in the hot sun. The cold feeling of the water on my body as I waded into the clear blue water of Lake Superior. The strong winds. The dark rocks. The green trees. The lichen dripping from the trees. The green green moss. The white sand beaches, empty but for a couple of people. How this feels like home…

To another long day of driving, visiting family in Sudbury, heading out to Grundy, then Killbear, and watching the most beautiful Ontario sunset over Georgian Bay, Lake Huron. So happy to be back on the shores of the bay. To Parry Sound, and the health food and used book store. Books piled high everywhere and people crammed in looking and searching for something to read. Picking up wild blueberries and gluten free cakes and curry to share with a friend by the lake. Driving the back roads to my favourite place where I lived for almost a year and being welcomed by one of my favourite pups.

Two glorious days in the trees, by the lake, paddling, hiking, sitting by a campfire with the loons calling, swinging in my hammock in the morning sun feeling so content and at peace. So happy to be back in my place. So happy to be home.

To a month of driving. To an incredible adventure. To dreaming up a life that feels like living - full, beautiful, free, alive, - and chasing and creating it for the rest of my life.

All for now,

All my love,

Onward.

-m